Ciaran’s Peculier [sic] Blog

It is a disgrace that “front-line” public servants like teachers should be included in the dishonest pay agreement announced on Monday. The Teachers’ union of Ireland (TUI) would be right to reject it. Unlike the “lower paid civil servants” for whom that wretch Blair Horan speaks, teachers already work long hours. What’s more they face increasing obstacles to doing their job through education cutbacks.

 When Horan’s members overcome the tedium of another day of pen-pushing, and the clock strikes four or five they are able to leave their “tasks” unfinished and unloved for another day, to be taken up if and when they return the following day. By contrast teachers’ work never ends when they leave the school; they bring home with them not only their pupils’ homework, but other jobs, such as working out lesson plans.

 And yet this pay agreement has the cheek to expect them to work an extra hour and for less pay. The result of this will be that teaching will be far less attractive as a career choice and will tend to be chosen by those who cannot get anything else which retains any social cachet. This lowering of standards will feed into the education system as a whole. We will then have a nation of dunces – just the thing really, as they won’t know how badly they’re being ripped off.

Do you ever wonder whether you’re living in a free country or whether the efforts of past generations to attain our freedom were  pointless? It sometimes seems as if the only icons of nationhood we see on a daily basis is the harp on official letters demanding money to support a corrupt and wasteful government. Sure, we have passports, but they’ve long been openly for sale to the highest bidder, and as an Irish passport holder there are many parts of the Middle East I wouldn’t feel safe going. So all of this sovereignty stuff is about as useful as a bowl of cold piss.

 Take recently when the head of a US-based multinational described our education system as “average”. Our education system lacks flexibility, and has traditionally been too much controlled by druids and their acolytes in far-right Catholic lay organisations, but with respect to my friends in the US and UK our education system is better.

 But this comment led to the Minister for Education, Batt O’Keefe, to launch an investigation into whether their had been “award inflation” (in other words, had people been given marks to which they were not entitled). This was but another act of insensitivity by this incompetent government. There are loads of people out there who, through no fault of their own, have lost their jobs or fear losing them. One of the few things they could feel sure about was their educational awards, but these have been devalued at a stroke. But these people must remember that their awards were earned through their own efforts unlike many of the hangers-on around this government who in spite of not having any awards to be proud of, have managed to crawl into lucrative and safe jobs.

 Minister O’Keefe said nothing about award inflation within Irish universities, particularly for scholarship examination taking place independently of the end of term exams, such as the “Schol” system within my own alma mater Trinity College, In order to get such a scholarship candidates must achieve first class honours. It has long been felt that award inflation has been at work here and that those who have benefited have been sons and daughters of politicians, such as our present cancerous minister for Finance Brian Lenihan Jr and Ms Rachel Hussey, daughter of former education minister Gemma Hussey and “elected” a scholar in 1985, when her mother was serving as minister for education, But all of these people were “smarter than the average bear Boo-Boo” and deserved their awards, whereas the “award inflation” spoken of by Minister O’Keefe only deals with small people.

John O’Donoghue has received a nice fat severance payment, plus pension, PLUS his TD’s salary, after looting the state’s coffers. Given the economic straights we are in, would it not be decent of him to give some of it back, or preferably make a donation to a charity or charities? I think it would be, but then decency is a quality in short supply among ALL our rulers, of whatever political party. The vast majority have been educated in denominational schools, whether by religious orders or their dioceses. Any attempt to limit the sphere of the religious in education is met with howls of indignation by the Catholic hierarchy. Admittedly I attended a Church of Ireland secondary school, the Royal School in Cavan, which, for reasons best known to its headmaster, is now ashamed to consider me a past pupil. Nevertheless, I still pride myself on knowing right from wrong and I can say with my hand on my heart that I have never stolen anything. 

 I don’t think though, they have much to be proud of. These schools have not produced better or more ethical people. Instead its products are greedy, nasty, narrow-minded hypocrites who however, are by and large willing to afford the Church a far wider influence than its dwindling numbers deserve.

O’Donoghue always showed what a nice Catholic boy he was when he’d start each Dail session with a prayer and a Sign of the Cross. This show reminded me of how classes were begun in the Catholic secondary school I attended for three months. There would be the recitation of the Hail Mary, with the l line “Seat of Wisdom Pray for Us” tagged on at the end;  if little Padedy or Micky wasn’t able to answer a question to the teacheer’s satisfaction he could look forward to receiving a coff on the ear – and that was from the lay teachers. But sure it made men of them - men who would think nothing of cheating on and beating their wives or abusing their children.  

More than ever I believe that I am in a kleptocracy, rules by thieves and scoundrels who are busily devising schemes of how much more they can steal from the little I have.

Oh to be stupid in contemporary Ireland –but to be thick would be very heaven!

 Were I stupid I wouldn’t realise how much I am being fucked up on a daily basis.

 I would swallow unquestioningly all the crap I heard. I would believe that those with better jobs – or in my case any job – were inherently better than me, cleverer, more intelligent, more able all round.

 I would believe that those governing me did so always with my best interests at heart, and that even when they were forced to take tough decisions they did so motivated by my well-being. They were far cleverer than little me, and most of them had degrees, which is something to do with universities.

 I would also hold it as an article of faith (well because I’m stupid I wouldn’t know what an article of faith was) that those given the tasks of enforcing government policy carried out their tasks selflessly yet courteously in even the most trying conditions. In turn they were also much more intelligent (maybe a little cleverer than the politicians but they never let on), so that when they said that black was white I could not contradict them – which I wouldn’t do anyway because I probably wouldn’t know what contradict meant.  

 But because the good Lord above saw fit to give me average intelligence and understanding of the world around me I must wear a veritable crown of thorny unhappiness. For I can see too well that many of those with jobs are often much stupider, or they do stupid things, and are bound by equally stupid rules. What’s more they often owe their jobs to their relationships to local politicians or to their family’s membership of certain political parties.

 I see so well that those who govern me (as well as many of those who would like to govern me) are a pack of dissembling, dishonest liars, motivated by a desire to enrich themselves, their families and cronies; who every so often indulge in a perverse pantomime of seeking my vote so that they can continue their larceny. They count amongst their raks a fair share of drunkards and drug addicts, and they participate in a a system which,m both at national and especially local level is veal and corrupt.

 And I observe impotently that those who work for the government are a group of retards, with intellects the size of petits pois (and personalities to match), who are motivated by nothing except craven self-preservation and awesome disregard of their fellow men and women.

 The first president of Equatorial Guinea, Francisco Macias Nguema (about whom I have written elsewhere), once outlawed unhappiness in his country and made it a mandatory duty to be happy.

 If I were stupid I’d be happy and content. Come on swine ‘flu.

I have learned that a good friend of mine, now sadly deceased, was the victim of a serious assault from a priest during his youth. It happened when he was a boarder in a diocesan secondary school. On his fifteenth birthday he received a present of some money – quite a large sum by the standards of the time. So excited was he that he began to jump up and down on his bed. He was observed by one of the priests who decided to offer some physical chastisement. So badly did he beat my friend that he needed hospital treatment. This would constitute an assault, but did the priest suffer for his actions? No, for no policeman would arrest him, no lawyer would prosecute him, and no judge would sentence him because he was a priest. But what sort of person beats up a child? He was certainly bigger than my friend at the time. What was more this coward could act in the full knowledge that his actions wouldn’t be resisted, for no one would hit a priest. To do so was to earn eternal damnation, not only for one’s self but possibly for one’s descendants.

My friend’s choice of career therefore, appears somewhat bizarre, for he trained to be a priest himself. Once ordained he was appointed to the teaching staff of the institution where he had been assaulted and indeed brutalised. Although I always found him to be the most harmless and inoffensive of men he had the reputation among students of being a “villain” and a “demon”. I have heard that he was given to outbursts of hysteria accompanied by physical violence towards students.

In later life he was appointed to a parish where he earned a reputation as a kindly pastor. In fact he tried to do the work of three men, even though his health wasn’t up to doing the work of one.

He was a most talented historian who has not received the recognition of those who have seized control of local history. Some of these people know all about silencing even the mere whisper of clerical abuse.

I don’t seek to lessen the evil acts of my friend or to call for understanding. Hr was a victim, firstly a direct victim of physical abuse, and secondly of a system which viewed physical violence by adults against adolescents as somehow acceptable. Like so many victims of systematic abuse he became a perpetrator.

Funny isn’t it the type of stuff you remember from your school days. I have some great memories from my time in Cavan’s Royal School, but I have one over-arching regret,

There was a teacher (I won’t name her to save her blushes) who was, quite frankly, on another planet, and she was unashamed at demonstrating how out of touch she was by saying really stupid things. Now one of the girls in my class was a very good-looking female called Juliet (not her real name). Actually she didn’t really do anything for me but my good friend Keith really fancied her. Now on one occasion this teacher made one of her many verbal gaffes, prompting Juliet to titter uncontrollably, whereupon the teacher turned to her and prophesied: “There will be a time in the future when you take your Leaving Cert results out of the drawer or wherever you’ll keep them and you will say to yourself ‘I now wish I had worked harder when I was at the Royal School.’ “

The moral of this story is that I often think of MY leaving cert results and my not inconsiderable achievements since then, and I say to myself. “I wish I hadn’t worked nearly as hard.”

I am pissed off. A recent report by the OECD found that there were high levels of poverty amongst the disabled in Ireland – not exactly news to me. It suggested that such poverty was because disabled people didn’t always have adequate access to training and education to gain qualifications. Well I have the highest degree I can get in my chosen area, a PhD in history, from one of Ireland’s most prestigious universities, Trinity College Dublin, and I am still poor, at least financially, and I expect to remain so for the rest of my life. You see, if you’re disabled, you can have all the qualifications you want, but you will still be sidelines or ignored. Public institutions will have nice verbal candy saying that they are “equal opportunities employers’ or that they are committed to the improvement of the lives of the disabled, but in practice this means sweet fu….

One skill that I have, along with the vast majority of people, is literacy. I am able to read and write and I enjoy both activities immensely. There are a small little clique – small in size but alas powerful – who wish I couldn’t write. Let me repeat I enjoy writing, as I feel it’s something I’m tolerably good at; I also love expressing myself. Yet since the onset of Multiple Sclerosis I cannot deny that I find it tiring. So when I write a letter or an e-mail to someone, and they don’t reply, I see it as the height of rudeness. I’m sure there are probably letters out there that I haven’t replied to, but the thought appals me. Anyone who sends me a message by e-mail, which is not rude or offensive, (and in fact it can be as offensive as it likes if it comes from someone I actually know), will receive a reply as quickly as I can write it.

People who read my blog will be aware of how I have talked about the problem of semi-literacy which affects some public officials, especially here In Cavan, and how I have spoken of schemes of intensive tutoring to help them, all paid for by the tax-payer naturally. I know well that these highly-paid mandarins are not semi-literate; they can read and write (and certainly count) as well as anyone; they are just plain bad-mannered with the social graces of a serially randy skunk who believes that they only need communicate with those who are important i.e. “The People”.

Sadly this rudeness also affects members of our legislature. I’m sick and tired of writing to TDs and never getting a reply. I’m tempted to introduce a “name and shame” scheme.

Another great excuse is that “we sent you an e-mail but you mustn’t have seen it.” What they are saying is that “You’re blind and partially sighted aren’t you. It’s a reasonable excuse to give when in fact we haven’t sent an invitation at all.” Let’s name and shame: I was a student of Cavan’s Royal School. I worked hard and got very good exams results. I thought I had brought honour on my school, and I was certainly proud of having attended it, feeling that it had taught me many things. Yet when the school decided to write its history I wasn’t asked to do this; in fact I wasn’t even asked to the launch of the book. My head-master said he had invited me by e-mail (itself not a proper form of invitation). The person whom he had charged with sending this electronic invitation claimed that he had sent it. He furthermore told me that there would be a further event related to the school’s history in September 2008. I waited for an invitation, which never came. To quote the title of one of Pedro Almodovar’s films “What have I done to deserve this?” The Gardai never had to come up to the school to question me. I was revising for my inter-cert when a group of vandals carried out an arson attack on an Orange hall near Bailieborough. It would have been common courtesy to be invited – courtesy was something that was instilled in me by the school’s teachers, but as is so often the case I tink it was more “Do as we say and not as we do.”

I’ve said enough. What’s more I’m getting tired.

The reaction to the changes in the medical card entitlements for over 70s have perhaps taken attention away from the idiotic cuts introduced in primary education last week, which will see teacher – pupil ratios skyrocket. The importance of lowering this ratio was recognised over thirty years’ ago by the then (Fianna Fail) minister John P. Wilson, but it seems that we are now rowing back in the gains of the past.

Any government that messes with primary education is deserving of a very large dunce’s cap, and they should be put out of the class altogether to stand in the hallway. The fact that we have in Ireland a well-educated population is the single most important factor of our prosperity in recent years – tax rates and “positive business climate” have very little to do with it, and if that goes we’ll just be another also-ran trying to attract inward investment. Primary education is the most important part of the educational system - screw it up and it’s very hard to make it right later on.

Brian Lenihan Jr has delivered his first budget, and indeed there should not be a back anywhere in Ireland that isn’t smarting from the imposition of this financial haishirt.

I knew Brian Lenihan Jr at Trinity, the fact that he is minister for finance and that I am well here need not concern us now. Let’s just say he never came across as the sharpest tool in the shed; I remember how we both attended a table-quiz and sat at contiguous tables, and how the personnel on our table supplied more than one answer to the assembled legal brains gathered around Brian oge.

Of course he was once elected a Scholar in Law entitling him to free tuition, free board in Trinity and a free meal (if he could stomach it) for five years. This had nothing to do with the fact that his father was at the time a minister in the government upon whom the College of the Holy and Unidvidied Trinity was dependant for its funding. What a horrible thought! No more than was the decision to grant a Law Scholarship to a girl whose mother just happened to be Minister for Education in a later government.

Brian oge has said (though he denies it) that the decision to means-test medical cards for the over-70s is a “feye-asco” foisted on him by the Minister for Health. I honestly don’t think he knew about it. The same could not be said for his colleague, Mary Harney, who is on record as saying she would prefer to be in the cut-and-thrust free-market environment of Boston than in the pink, liberal, socialist environs of Berlin. She of course is a fan of Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher, that b*$ch who supped tea with the mass murderer Pinochet.

But the government hardly needs Harney’s support. She is one of only two PD TDs (one of whom is expected to show un-rat-like courage and rejoin Fianna Fail soon) and the FFers can comfortably rely for support on John Gormless and his pals for the considerable future. So why do they put up with her? Why don’t they make life easy for themselves by saying: “Look Mary, why don’t you do yourself and the country a really big favour and FUCK OFF to Boston!”

PS. I hope there are no members of Cavan County Council who think I’m belittling myself here? The fact is I like belittling myself: you could say it’s one of my hobbies.

Recently I was discussing the Irish language with a friend. I mentioned my deep love for Irish, but how, when it came to the dreaded Leaving Certificate, my bottle smashed and I opted for the Pass course instead, receiving a rather impressive “A” mark in the final exam. I felt that my good mark owed something to my success in the oral exam, whereupon my friend stated that he hated oral Irish exams, and indeed wondered whether there was an anal Irish exam. I replied that there was hardly any need as the Irish language had been fucked up the arse for decades anyway.